On Motivation and Increasing your Chance of Success
We are coming up to that time of year, New Year’s Resolution time. You know, that time when we join the gym, start a diet, resolve to change our ways for the better. Wonderful! All excellent ideas. Then February rolls around and we realize that our resolutions have fallen by the wayside. What happened? We had every intention of sticking to our plans. Maybe you are one of those people who doesn’t bother making New Year’s Resolutions because you know that you won’t stick with them.
So, what happens to our resolutions, our plans to change? We blame ourselves, get mad at ourselves, call ourselves all sorts of names, all without realizing what it takes to effect positive change.
It takes about 66 repetitions for something to become a habit. Yes, sixty-six. That works out to over two months if we do something every single day. Four months if we do it every other day. A whole year if we repeat it about six times a month. That’s a lot of repetitions!
We need to find a way to set reasonable goals for what we want to achieve. Instead of vowing to go to the gym 5 or 6 times a week, start with twice a week. Build into that a backup plan for those weeks when life just gets away from you. Maybe you can walk for half an hour on your lunch hour. Maybe you can do some stretches at home or even at your desk. Baby steps. The weeks that you manage more than twice are a bonus. Once that twice a week has become ingrained in you, once you feel that you are ready, then add a day. Yes, a single day. And congratulate yourself on having managed twice a week. Celebrate the changes, no matter how small.
Let’s take a closer look at the mechanics of motivation. How are you motivated? We are definitely not all the same! Not only are we different, but how we are motivated varies depending upon the context. How you are motivated at work may be completely different from how you are motivated at home. How you are motivated to plan a vacation is likely not the same as how you are motivated to go grocery shopping. So examine each situation independently.
First of all, are you proactive or reactive? A proactive person talks in terms of actions, getting it done, short sentences. A person who is reactive likes to think before they act, contemplate, give it time, or try it out. The way you talk to yourself will reflect this. ‘I need to sleep on this before deciding.’ is very different from ‘Where’s the pen? I’ll sign now.’
If you are proactive then you tend to jump into action. I would suggest that you take a moment to write down your goals then read them again later, making sure that you weren’t acting on the spur of the moment! If you are reactive, then set yourself a timeframe to consider, and maybe even try out, what you would like to achieve. You are far more likely to take your time developing a plan than someone who is proactive.
Do you move toward a goal or away from something you no longer want? Again, the language that you use will give you clues. If you are motivated by moving toward a goal, then set yourself specific milestones or markers to achieve. ‘I will go to the gym twice a week.’ If you are motivated by moving away from something you no longer want, then make a list of situations that you want to avoid. ‘I will not walk down the grocery aisle with the cake display.’
How do you know when you are achieving your goals? Are you able to tell yourself that you’re doing a great job and feel good about it? Or do you need someone else to tell you that you are succeeding? Make sure that you make a point of giving yourself feedback if you are internally motivated, or get feedback from a friend or colleague if you need external validation. A cheering section can be very motivating! It is very important that we feel good about our progress.
Do you work best with lots of choices to pick from? Or do you achieve more if you have a step by step guide on how to complete a task? I love lots of choices, that way I can constantly change it up. I love to keep lists, pick things at random to get done, and then cross them off. However, many people need a template, a flowchart that they can follow sequentially from A to Z. If that is you, then draw up a flowchart so that you can plan and keep track of how you are doing.
How do you react to change? Do you like things to remain the same? Do you like things to evolve over time? Do you prefer things to be different? Or do you really love evolution and revolution? Shape your goals around what works best for you. If you like things to remain the same, then set goals that are very similar to how things are currently, don’t go for radical change! Slow and steady is probably the best way for you to succeed. If you love change, if you are a fan of evolution and revolution, then go for completely different and enjoy the excitement, the challenge, and the ride!
Take a look at all the factors above, they will help you to set goals that stand a higher chance of success. You will be far more likely to remain motivated and achieve your goal.
If you are interested in learning more about your personal motivation and working traits I am offering a holiday special. Pick a subject or context where you are struggling with motivation. We connect via phone or Skype, I ask a few questions and listen to the language that you use in your answers. From there I will draw up a written report on how you are motivated and how you remain motivated. Only $40 for the call and written report. Please use the form below to contact me.
If you would like help with getting your life unstuck, I am Soul Mentor, trained in listening to your deeper self and helping you find your way. Message me through this blog. My website is in progress and should be live shortly. Thank you.
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